Things that could have been

I've taken to stalking the facebook profiles of people I guess I could once call friends. Now we are probably merely acquaintances with history.

It's a little sad. Such wonderful people I would have loved to continue having a steady relationship with. But sometimes the desire is not mutual and we just fade away. And for me, a large part of it was my JC life. A whole two years of my life which seem to be cut off, a blackout. Secondary was formative and university, the best years of my youth. So I guess JC kind of fell through the cracks. But still its with some regret that I look back and realise not any of my friendships then held on or developed further. And I used to call one, the sister I never had.

But much like how siblings never really get along and never really have a best friend relationship, ours faded with a lack of contact. Perhaps I was enjoying the new relationships I made in university.

So I guess it's just a messy ball of could have beens.

That is why I'm really glad that there are people in my life, that make time for me. Who drop by to say a little
greeting. Thank you.

And even now where work is 90% of my time, I will make that extra effort to meet you, to have a chat. Not because I know you will do the same. but honestly, because to me, you're worth it. :)

I wonder how long can this last.

I'm okay with growing old, not so okay with growing up.

Making grown up choices and decisions and making grown up steps.

It's all a little scary.

I want to be frivolous. I want to not care. Or care, but still do it anyway.



I went to Seoul last month. Pretty awesome cause I had good company. But yeah, I prefer Japan. I guess cause it's more familiar to me. But the lifestyle of a hipster coffee cup in one hand, some form of technology (iPadmini, macbook) in a nice cozy cafe is something I can totally get used to.

Of course there's the weather. Beautiful weather.