Invested emotions.

Words cannot express how I feel now. Just, the rush of emotion is amazing. I can't believe I've so much invested emotion into these boys. WTF, I judge myself.

:)

This is me.

"But there’s always going to be people like that in life; people you’re terribly sensitive to. Your own emotions count for nothing as long as they’re smiling and you hate yourself for it, hate yourself for thinking that every single gesture and word from that person matter more than you, but there’s nothing you can do about it except drink yourself into oblivion. Then you wake up the next morning –wishing your head will fall off by itself– only to find that the sun’s still up and the cycle repeats. That, is not very fun."

St Valentines had something going for him

Happy Valentines Day! I like celebrations, it's an excuse to spend money and treat yourself well. I don't care that its commercialism and evil capitalism at work. It feels great and I like it.

Today was once again a singles valentines, but it's wonderful reading about the awesome valentines my friends have. :) It's always a blessing to see happy people.

On Friday a friend's Dad passed away. Instantly when I heard the news, my mind flashed back to you. How when they nailed the coffin shut, they nailed a part of my heart in it. Sometimes I'm so afraid of forgetting, times like these remind me that I won't.

I miss you.

The best 红包 ever.

Above is the CNY goodies table at my grandmother's house. As expected, there was plenty of heated bad for you food all around. Still the food my grandmother cooks tastes best. Probably because its the kind of food I grew up eating, so it will forever taste like coming home.

This year the best 红包 didn't come from anyone to me. It was actually the fat 红包 I was able to give my grandmother. It felt great to be able to give her money, to be able to give her something back after all these years. My family isn't the closest of all, but we do things our own way and at the end of it all, we're family.

To me, this means something.